Dave, I have a feeling that, in your case, adding the "magic formula" to your statements would have a HUGE therapeutic effect. I don't pretend that you trust me, so here is something for you: I think that your daughter is still part of a treatment program and her family is part of the plan. Now, why don't you ask one of her therapeutists why she did what she did while she was with YOU, in YOUR house? She could have done the same thing while she was with her mother or in every other moment, but no: she did it in your own house. Didn't it occur to you that maybe she was trying to send you a message?

You also write:

"please don't tell me that because I am strong willed and confident in my abilities ( a MUST HAVE quality for any entertainer) that my family suffers proportionatly".

Fine, then why don't you keep your "bravado facade" for the business side of your life and try to be more humble or less assertive when dealing with your relatives, your Synthzone fellow members or your loved ones (including any future readhead?)
Once again, I have a feeling that this would have a HUGE positive effect on your personal life.
With friendship,
Andrea