Well where to start?
My real name being Baroness Lucia Von Strumpetta (of the Kensington Strumpetta's)obviously was far too much of a mouthfull to be used as my nick. Also I have often found that my title is intimidating to ordinary people. People tend only to see the title and never the talent
The sacrifices one has had to make to appear normal (
) have oft been hardly bearable. You want to try playing a 9000PRO in full ballgown and tiarra. Not easy I can tell you! Have you ever held a sm58 with a diamond as big as Scunthorpe on your digit?
Only last week my dear cousin (we call her madge you call her majesty) commanded a musical evening at the palace. You should have seen me struggle to get my organ up the mall! Prince Edward was sulking all night because I had not included any Dusty Springfield in the program. Dear boy cheered up somewhat though when I did a few Judy Garland standards. That boy worries me sometimes.
Of course that was not the end of it! Oh no! The Coldstream Guards all but hijacked me on the way out and insisted I perform in the barrackroom all over again. I am known throughout the capital for my willingness to serve the military and so how could I refuse.
Anyway to get to the point.... Tony W...
I stole the name from some peasant who wrote to me whining on about the plight of aquarium bred fish (guppies to be precise) in pet shops across the land.
I do hope you all still adore me now my cover is blown
Tony W (you know who
)