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#340785 - 02/24/12 09:41 PM
Re: I must be the only jerk here
[Re: Fran Carango]
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Senior Member
Registered: 01/01/09
Posts: 2195
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The time to reach young people is before they "try" drugs..
Sorry Fran, that's a pretty naive view. Do you know how much "trying" of drugs goes on in schoolyards everywhere? As a parent, you surely must know that you can't keep kids, especially as they get a bit older, under your surveillance 24/7. Something like crack, one of the most widely used drugs is available all over the place, and one hit and it's got you. Trying is part of the rebellion/exploration inherent in young people. Not only that, but peer pressure is a very powerful component at these young ages. The need to be 'cool', 'popular', etc. Have you forgotten all that from your own younger years? I take it you did "try" sex for the first time out of your parents' watchful gaze, didn't you? You may have "tried" a cigarette for the first time in some sort of clandestine fashion, didn't you? If you'd "tried" to steal a candy bar from Woolworths it would have been out of sight of anyone, wouldn't it? Sex, cigarettes and theft, while not life destroying by themselves (except for cigarettes) can all morph into addiction. So when "trying" a drug, yes even for the first time, it more often than not escalates into an addition all too easily and swiftly, especially with the encouragement of the guy pushing the stuff. War on drugs? That's been about as successful as the war on terrorism. Of course, that doesn't mean we should give up "trying", does it?.
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#340823 - 02/25/12 07:18 AM
Re: I must be the only jerk here
[Re: 124]
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Senior Member
Registered: 05/26/99
Posts: 9673
Loc: Levittown, Pa, USA
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The time to reach young people is before they "try" drugs..
Sorry Fran, that's a pretty naive view. Do you know how much "trying" of drugs goes on in schoolyards everywhere? As a parent, you surely must know that you can't keep kids, especially as they get a bit older, under your surveillance 24/7. Something like crack, one of the most widely used drugs is available all over the place, and one hit and it's got you. Trying is part of the rebellion/exploration inherent in young people. Not only that, but peer pressure is a very powerful component at these young ages. The need to be 'cool', 'popular', etc. Have you forgotten all that from your own younger years? I take it you did "try" sex for the first time out of your parents' watchful gaze, didn't you? You may have "tried" a cigarette for the first time in some sort of clandestine fashion, didn't you? If you'd "tried" to steal a candy bar from Woolworths it would have been out of sight of anyone, wouldn't it? Sex, cigarettes and theft, while not life destroying by themselves (except for cigarettes) can all morph into addiction. So when "trying" a drug, yes even for the first time, it more often than not escalates into an addition all too easily and swiftly, especially with the encouragement of the guy pushing the stuff. War on drugs? That's been about as successful as the war on terrorism. Of course, that doesn't mean we should give up "trying", does it?. Naive view...far from it..I can only base what has worked for me and my family... Maybe explaining the above story to your youngsters instead of justifying to me that it won't work...could be part of the solution...Here is a hint...it works... Peer pressure for kids can be large, but offset that with "not wanting to fail in the eyes of parents" can be a stronger pressure...and when it is shown in "black and white" ...that it is wrong, and literally stupid....they will grow up with the proper attitude to teach their kids... I am so tired of cop outs, and blaming surroundings and peer pressure...If parents did their part from day one, we would have a higher success rate with "war against drugs".. I have said this before..but let me re confirm... My parents did not do drugs (example to me), other than my mother's addiction to smoking cigs (in itself another great lesson)... My brother and I did no drugs , not even smoking cigs..My wife , 4 children, their spouses, and my 6 grandchildren..do no drugs...and they do not smoke.......Coincedence?..Not a chance..Firm teaching and explaining the downfall while they are young...they will see enough examples around them without the need for family examples.. I will continue to be the outspoken one...it seems to work..
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#340861 - 02/25/12 07:13 PM
Re: I must be the only jerk here
[Re: Tom Cavanaugh]
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Senior Member
Registered: 01/01/09
Posts: 2195
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Fran, I'm not blaming surroundings or peer pressure, I'm merely pointing out some realities and just how strong those factors that I mentioned really are. I think we can agree that drug abusers come from all kinds of families, good and bad.
Like yourself, my wife and I have been doing our part from day one. How else would our older daughter now be a surgeon, and our younger one a Registered Psychologist? No abuse of anything by either of them and, much as I'd like to think that was entirely because of our efforts in their upbringing, it could well have been a case of 'but for the grace of God'.
Again, similar to your own situation, my parents did no drugs - again, apart from my mother being a heavy smoker, which I'm sure was instrumental in my staying away from cigarettes. Never smoked, drank, done drugs myself, the wife neither.
So you see we share some similarities. But I do honestly believe that the slide into drug abuse has contributing factors other than strong parenting.
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