Yesterday I played at a new senior venue and was greeted by a full house and a very enthusiastic AD. The gig was going really great with lots of applause and singing and I was on a roll. A gentleman approached me and asked If I would play St. Louis Blues. I told him sure and started playing the number. About 4 measures into the song a lady - very well dressed - stood up and began dancing - by about the middle of the song she had completely taken off her blouse and was in the process of removing her skirt when the AD rushed up to me and said stop playing right now!!!

Turns out the lady, age 87, was indeed a stripper in her heyday and for some reason every time she hears St. Louis Blues she gets up and does her little strip routine. I about died laughing but you really had to be there to appreciate the humor in it. Meanwhile, the guy who requested the song sat in his chair and about died laughing - he knew all along what would happen.
When I was getting ready to leave the AD said she was really sorry and had forgotten to tell me not to play ST. Louis Blues.
We should all right books.

Deane

Love it Deane,

Frank

That must have been funny but I'm glad I wasn't there!

... funny to hear, but probably not so much to see ...

Try this one, then. This happened about six weeks ago at a NH gig. The residents in this part of the facility are at the more advanced assisted care level.

So there we are setting up and a little lady comes up and the conversation goes like this:

"Excuse me, is that your wife over there?"
"Yes, that's my lovely lady." I reply.

So the lady toddles over to my wife and says, "I hope you don't mind but I have a question for you. You won't be offended, will you?"

Taking it lightly, my wife says, "Okay, how can I help?"

Then, straight out, this little old lady asks, "Could I have sex with your husband?"

My wife, quite taken aback by this, but ever cool, says gently, "No, not today, dear."

To which the lady replies, "Well okay, but that's my room over there. I'll leave the door open if you change your mind."

So, we play the hour gig and were joking about it with one of the staff afterwards and, laughing, she said, "Oh, that must've been M*****. It's not the first time she's approached our entertainers."

Just when you think you've seen it all, eh?

Do you have pics....oh never mind

How about this story, I dont know if it's true ?????

The Hypnotist at a Senior Citizen's Home

It was entertainment night at the senior citizens' centre.
After the community sing along led by Alice at the piano, it was time for the star of the show - Claude the Hypnotist!

Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience into a trance.
"Yes, each and every one of you and all at the same time." said Claude.

The excited chatter dropped to silence as Claude carefully withdrew from his waistcoat pocket; a beautiful antique gold pocket watch and chain.

"I want you to keep your eyes on this watch" said Claude, holding the watch high for all to see. "It is a very special and valuable watch that has been in my family for six generations" said Claude.

He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting
"Watch the watch --- Watch the watch ----Watch the watch"

The audience became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth.
The lights were twinkling as they were reflected from its gleaming surfaces.

A hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of the gently swaying watch.
They were hypnotized.

And then, suddenly, the chain broke!!!
The beautiful watch fell to the stage and burst apart on impact"

"SHIT" said Claude.

It took them three days to clean the Senior Citizens' Centre and Claude was never invited there again.


Frank

Zuki,

Many of the places in Texas do not allow us to take pictures of the residents.
When I started playing senior venues it was not a problem and I often had pictures taken with residents but in recent years more and more of them don't allow it.

Deane

True story...

A local singer/guitarist solo artist in my area just started playing Nursing Homes. He wears a toupee, and has been for years.

On his second gig, one of the ladies in the audience shouted up to him, "Hey buddy, is that a wig you got on?"

Probably because of the nature of his audience, he replied, kind of sheepishly,"Why, yes it is dear."

She came back with "Gee you'd never know it."

LOL! Sharp as a tack, some of 'em.

Deane,

Had it been a young dolly bird, no doubt you would have played a quickstep, you can tell a good tale, I believe you thousand wouldn't apparently the old girl was stone deaf, work that one out..