In her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance.

The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, penned by a US resident, which was posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:

Dear Dr. Laura:

Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination ... End of debate.

I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to follow them.

1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are purchased from neighbouring nations.
A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?

2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?

3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of Menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24.
The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offence.

4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odour for the Lord - Lev.1:9.
The problem is my neighbours. They claim the odour is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?

5. I have a neighbour who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death.
Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?

6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?

7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?

8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?

9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?

10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14)

I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I'm confident you can help.

Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.

Your adoring fan.

James M. Kauffman, Ed.D. Professor Emeritus, Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education University of Virginia
(It would be a damn shame if we couldn't own a Canadian)

^LOL! Brilliant! And there are people who believe this stuff?

OMG! I LOVE this. I just forwarded it to some of my atheist friends. If it turns out we CAN own a Canadian, I'm going for either Rachel McAdams or Nina Dobrov . We'll send back Jim Carrey in exchange.

chas

Just remember, they ( Canadians) still can own an American, as they are generally viewed as having a multicultural background; but Chinese can't as the import tax is too high.


Allan

What having a Canadian slave?! or do you mean a Mexican one? Or just wanting one for the collection?

Anyway, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, she is an observant Orthodox Jew, so she HAS to believe and observe these LAWS that were given to the JEWS to stay CLEAN and OBEDIENT.

That is OK for her, so what, leave her alone; she is allowed in a democracy to have her way of life, or her own an opinion, isn't she?

I can't stand Brussels sprouts, after the way my mum cooked them, lol, but that's my opinion.

Getting back to keeping those LAWS, to be a true JEW, she MUST keep all of the LAWS, not just the 10 commandments. There are hundred of by-laws etc, put on them by their Rabbis down the ages. No wonder some walk away from it all and just quote theory and not do the practical things.

But on the other side of things there is nothing in the Bible or Koran to say you can't own a Canadian, but my question is where would you put them?

You can't keep them in the house, too close to the fridge; can't keep them in the wine cellar ( I don't have one) but they will sample the wine. Can't keep them outside, everyone will want one. Can't keep them in the bathroom, for obvious reasons.
Can't put them in the dog house...... or can you???? mmmmmmm

Well not sure, any suggestions?

Priceless!

R.