BRAIN CRAMPS
>
>
> Question: If you could live forever, would you and why?
> Answer: "I would not live forever, because we should not
> live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever,
> then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever,
> which is why I would not live forever."
> Miss America 1995 from Alabama
> Heather Whitestone
>
>
>
> "Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids
> all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love
> to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and
> death and stuff."
> Popular Pop Singer
> Mariah Carey
>
>
>
> "Smoking kills. If you're killed, you've lost
> a very important part of your life,"
> (During an interview to become
> Spokesperson for federal anti-smoking campaign.)
> Model, movie and TV actress
> Brooke Shields
>
>
> "I've never had major knee surgery on any other part
> of my body,"
> University of Kentucky Basketball Forward
> Winston Bennett
>
>
> "Outside of the killings, Washington has one of the
> lowest crime rates in the country,"
> Washington DC Mayor
> Marion Barry
>
>
> "I'm not going to have some reporters pawing through
> our papers. We are the president."
> (Commenting on the release of subpoenaed documents.)
> First Lady and
> Democratic Senator from New York
> Hillary Clinton
>
>
> "That lowdown scoundrel deserves to be kicked to death
> by a jackass, and I'm just the one to ! do it,"
> A congressional candidate in Texas
>
>
> "Half this game is ninety percent mental."
> Philadelphia Phillies Manager
> Danny Ozark
>
>
> "It isn't pollution that's harming the environment. It's
> the impurities in our air and water that are doing it."
> Vice President
> Al Gore
>
> "We are ready for any unforeseen event that
> may or may not occur."
> Vice President
> Al Gore
>
>
> "I love California . I practically grew up in Phoenix ."
> Vice President
> Dan Quayle
>
>
>
> "We've got to pause and ask ourselves,
> How much clean air do we need?"
> Chrysler Chairman and CEO
> Lee Iacocca
>
>
> "The word "genius" isn't applicable in football.
> A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."
> NFL Quarterback and Sports Analyst
> Joe Theisman
>
>
> "We don't necessarily discriminate. We simply
> exclude certain types of people."
> ROTC Instructor
> Colonel Gerald Wellman
>
>
> "If we don't succeed, we run the risk of failure."
> President
> Bill Clinton
>
>
> "Traditionally, most of Australia 's
> imports! come from overseas."
> Keppel Enderbery
>
>
>
> "Your food stamps will be stopped effective
> March 1992 because we received notice that
> you passed away. May God bless you. You may
> reapply if there is a change in your circumstances."
> Greenville , South Carolina
> Department of Social Services
>
>
> "If somebody has a bad heart, they can plug this jack
> in at night as they go to bed and it will monitor their
> heart throughout the night. And the next morning, when
> they wake up dead, there'll be a record."
> FCC Chairman
> Mark S. Fowler
>
>
> Feeling smarter yet?
>
>
> Send it on to your brilliant friends.
> I just did!!
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